Some of 2013’s Dumbest Criminals

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Here at SpotCrime, we think we’ve seen and read it all in terms of ridiculous crime stories. But, just when you think you’ve seen the most ridiculous story, we stumble across a story 200 times more ridiculous.

We try to share all kinds of stories with you on our Facebook pages - SpotCrime and MyLocalCrime - and always welcome your feedback and comments. Starting a discussion about crime is a good step in the right direction for safer communities.

Here is a list we’ve compiled of the most ridiculous stories we saw over 2013. Stories that make you want to do the Homer Simpson ‘Doh!’ forehead slap. Enjoy!

The DUI Couple
A husband and wife from Pennsylvania were charged with separate DUI's. The husband got picked up for a DUI, then his wife showed up to the police station to pick him up - under the influence. 

Smart Phone = Smart Victim = Dumb Criminal
Anyone who attempts to steal a smart phone and leaves the smart phone on is and idiot in my book. There are a lot of apps to track your smart device if it's lost or stolen. So why are criminals still trying to snag the devices? Not sure we can answer that one for you.

Drinking and Driving Don't Mix
Especially if you are attempting to drive away with $18,000 worth of beer! Is beer really worth it? Homer Simpson would think so, I guess...D'OH! These thieves made away with a van full of beer in Fayettville, NC. 
Cops Love Donuts! 
And so does Homer. But, is it really worth it to break the law to get a sweet treat? This dumb criminal impersonated an officer to get a free donut on multiple occasions. When the store caught on, an real police investigation went underway and arrested the impostor.
View the entire story here.

Craigslist ad Hitman Leads to Arrest
Really? This criminal advertised on Craigslist he was looking for a gun and someone to kill his grandfather. When an undercover cop answered the ad and met the man in a parking lot, he offered the cop an iPod and a year of free haircuts for the hit. There aren't words to describe this stupidity.

Peewee Football ends in Adult Brawl
Texas parents must really take their football seriously. Parents began fighting in the parking lot after a peewee football game. Way to set an example for your kids!
View the entire story here.

Dog Tortured and left in Park
Not only was a helpless puppy tortured, it was left for dead in a park!
View the entire story here.

Golden Delicious Shower...
A man from Sweden entered a grocery store drunk, headed to the produce isle, and proceeded to relieve his bladder on the apples. Gross! Not sure how he didn't think he'd get caught.
View the entire story here.

Turning Yourself In
An arrest couldn't have come easier to the Prince William County. this man brought his computer into the police department claiming he received a message from the FBI while watching porn. When the police searched his computer, they found pictures and messages with 13 year old girls. The man was arrested immediately for child porn. This is definitely a D'OH! moment, but we're happy this guy was arrested!
View the entire story here.

Mom Killed Baby So Cops Wouldn't Take Him Away
I think this headline says it all. This woman (a crackhead) told police she killed her baby so police couldn't take him away because of her crack use. Really? Don't do drugs ladies and gentlemen, or you'll end up like this idiot. Granted there may have been some mental issues involved (she attempted suicide as well), but putting drugs in the mix doesn't help.
View the entire story here.

Woman Fakes Cancer for Drug Money
OK. Faking a hurt ankle because you don't want to run at practice - that's believable. Faking feeling sick to get out of work - believable. But faking an illness as serious as cancer to collect money for your heroin habit? Stupid and absolutely despicable! Her grandmother even sold her house to give the woman $100,000 for 'chemotherapy treatments.' You'll be happy to hear that this idiot was arrested.

Mom Duct Tapes Children's Faces as 'Joke'
I guess this mom doesn't know a tasteless joke when she thinks of one. The woman and another adult duct taped the heads of two children leaving only their nostrils uncovered, then sent a picture of the children to on of their fathers. She was arrested. Funny? No. Mature? No. Dumb? Definitely!

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